I haven’t written much lately but that doesn’t mean my mind hasn’t been working over time. In fact I’ve thought of so many things to write about but haven’t been able to get them out. The trouble that seems to have come with getting a bit better has been a distracted busy mind ( I think Buddhists call it monkey brain) and expectations that don’t match the reality of my physical abilities.
I can do more but not as much as I used to. My mind is far ahead of every situation, trying to push me to achieve more. It leads to days of confused goals and strategies. What I think I should be able to do but I’m not sure I can. Should I do this now or wait till later? Yesterday I was feeling crappy and needed to get some things done but couldn’t work out which order to do them in and eventually lay down on the couch and promptly fell asleep for 2 hours. It turned out to be the right thing to do, because I was able to think clearer afterwards and get everything done. Still it bothers me, still after almost 2years I’m not used to including the option to nap as a serious consideration.
