Day 25: Free from second guessing

I’m really tired. What I think is happening now is that my body is doing a decent job of recovering and continuing to find strength and get on with life but my mind is over-worked.  It’s worrying and thinking and turning over situations, questioning everything, trying to find answers and work out what happened and … Continue reading Day 25: Free from second guessing

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Change

November is going to be about changing stuff.  Changing habits, changing diets, changing thought patterns... because none of them are really working for me.  They say insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result right? Time after time, I have attempted to change my habits and even though I … Continue reading Change

Straight lines

Today I read a quote about creativity ... "The creative process does not travel in straight lines. It thrives in the undefined spaces in between." and the idea resonated with me and my experience of recovery.  It 'aint a straight line! Some days you feel good and think you're getting better, the next day you … Continue reading Straight lines

Things I will do once I’m better

Im my collating past results and re-reading posts, so far it’s been all downhill… Here I am 8 months in, almost 2 years ago, with a list of things I hope to do when I’m better and I now can, although I’m not completely better. This is encouraging.

What's wrong with me?

It’s felt like a very long time, this last 8 months and I know (or hope) that one day this too, will have passed and we can all look back with ‘gosh, remember that year I was so sick?’.  Fingers crossed!

When I’m all fixed I will:

Take my daughter to the zoo to pat the quokkas

Go out for dinner with adults, at night time!

Visit my friends for coffee

Walk to work and back (it’s only 10 minutes)

Clean my house myself

Walk to the beach with my daughter

Its not a massive list of requests!  A quite reasonable one I think, it’s not like I’m a professional dancer and want to begin training daily.  Sometimes I wonder how sick I am below the surface, particularly when I have a reaction like the last few days to some vacuuming and tidying.  My life and expectations have been slowly lowering…

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