When I got sick, coming up on 3 years ago now, my life was hijacked and became about recovering and mis-understanding my recovery and confusion. The process of looking for what was wrong, trying different approaches and recognising what I could and couldn't do, left me quite directionless as far as work, relationships and achievement … Continue reading Not one direction?
Today I read a quote about creativity ... "The creative process does not travel in straight lines. It thrives in the undefined spaces in between." and the idea resonated with me and my experience of recovery. It 'aint a straight line! Some days you feel good and think you're getting better, the next day you … Continue reading Straight lines
Back in June I made some changes to my medications, specifically the time of day I took the T3 and T4, which helped. I suffered less fatigue, slept better, less brain fog and I thought 'This is it! I've found out what's wrong with me and this is when I finally get better!'. But since … Continue reading Where am I?
Yesterday was spent just hanging with my 5 yr old. I am often so flat these days that it just feels like the best thing to do is to stay home and find stuff to do here. She seems to enjoy it, but I worry about when she’s older, will I have kicked this problem by … Continue reading Thyroid is the word…
It's not been an easy week, for some reason. I've needed long naps a couple of times ( yes I know, after mentioning I didn't need them anymore). Sometimes it's hard to work out where to place the blame. The 5 year old still comes in most nights and interrupts my sleep, sometimes she sleeps well … Continue reading Reminders
I can spend hours searching online for answers if the mood strikes me. I fall in and out of feeling the need to search for similar stories to mine and looking for new research, concepts or thoughts. I still feel like I'm looking for what is wrong with me and expecting to find one answer … Continue reading Some lists are good.
I paused last night to question myself, how it can be that I still feel like life is rushing by when I've made so many changes to it specifically designed to allay this feeling. How can the days seem so busy when I no longer work full-time? And they seemed so long when I did. For a long … Continue reading Work with it
In a recent spate of spring cleaning, or more accurately 'any-season minimising' the amount of stuff I have, I opened a box that I had assumed contained baby clothes. I knew I'd had trouble with the idea of throwing away my daughters clothes from her first year. As she's grown the clothes have become less important but … Continue reading Letting the thoughts out of the box
...last winter feeling the cold inside my bones and the terrible worry of wondering if I might be sick forever. Never being able to do more than one thing like grocery shopping or going to the library with my daughter, in one day. Waking up feeling tired, feeling heavy in my limbs and struggling to pull myself … Continue reading I remember
One day I will not think about being ill anymore. I will not worry about how many hours of sleep I have had or will get. I won't think about the food I'm eating and wonder if it's hurting my body. I won't have anymore blood tests and everyone will have forgotten this happened. One … Continue reading One day…