This may be the dumbest analogy you've ever read but it dawned on me today that managing recovery from a long-term illness is like handling a child's diet... Bear with me... My 4-year-old does not like vegetables - which 4 year old does? - and trying to get them into her diet is torturous for … Continue reading Dumb analogies
The last 2 weeks have been a new hell. A sinus infection raged out of control for at least a week. I couldn't sleep well at night, the pain in my forehead, my jaw and seemingly my teeth waking me up. The ache in my right ear every time I swallowed. The stuff I was blowing … Continue reading The Beach
I was having a bit of a re-read over my blog this morning at 5am, as you do when you have a pounding sinus headache that won't let you sleep... just on that, I have a cold. I have a cold. I haven't had a cold since I started this whole journey 18 months ago. … Continue reading I have a cold
Yesterday I visited the third new doctor at Integrative Health Solutions (the other two having left shortly after I saw them!) and came away with a new term for what they think is going on with me. HPA Axis Dysregulation. Turns out, according to the literature they gave me, it's the correct term for what people label … Continue reading Another new diagnosis
I stumbled across this interview after clicking on an email from the SolveCFS initiative. To be honest I've been largely ignoring their emails since I signed up because I'd gotten into a fairly negative headspace surrounding CFS, and it felt like nothing new was being discussed and nothing they said could help me, because it was … Continue reading Is he Belle or Sebastian?
It's late again. The internet's switched off. It's almost as if that off switch turns on the power to complete the train of thoughts that have been scratching around the back of my mind all day. I've been really hard on myself for the last week, without even realising it. The psychologist told me to ban … Continue reading What’s going on in my mind?
Why do these thoughts come to me so late? Often, I'm getting ready to go to bed, I've shut down the computer and suddenly a blog post thought arrives. Tonight my mind was boggling. I was marvelling at the long path, the really long road I’ve taken to get here. Not that here is the … Continue reading Hyper-vigilance
Being a parent gives you hard edges. With my 4 year old we're at the stage where I'm telling her off every few minutes. You almost couldn't script it better with things I never thought I'd need to say like 'don't touch that, put that down, sit up straight, don't throw that there, pick that up, I'm not … Continue reading Hard edges
I'm fairly sure I've written on this topic before. Life. Seems to be full of ridiculous contradictions. Well mine is anyway. I need to sleep but I can't. I recognise competition is not good for me, but I can't stop competing. I love to write, but I don't want to complete my writing course. I … Continue reading There is no spoon
This'll be a quick update - I'm having trouble with wooziness in the head and looking at computer screens doesn't help. I expected that after a week of training, long days in a classroom environment, hotel room beds, changed diet and meeting new people I would have some repercussions but I fully expected fatigue not dizziness. … Continue reading What’s your unwell?