Reading back over my post about insomnia and how I promised to take the Circadin for one more week to see how it went, well, that following night, I stopped taking it. A week isn’t really long enough for something to take affect, but I just didn’t want to waste any more time with drowsiness and poor sleep combined.
Instead, I cut the ‘wheat replacement’ stuff out again. I had started enjoying ‘bread’ for want of a better word, made from a bunch of ingredients bunged together to try and approximate bread. Corn-starch, maize, dates, rice, tapioca flour? I was warned and I didn’t listen! The purist Whole30 program said not to replace things you miss, because you just can’t have them. So don’t make gluten-free muffins or sugar-free brownies or that odd paste to mimic milk that paleo-diet followers make. Just stop eating it and get over it.
So I cut out the bread again and a week later I feel better. But, you know, it may not even be the bread. If I look at the mind-stuff, it could be the relief of resigning from work (which I did on Thursday), and the stress of that decision that was keeping me up.
I think we spend a lot of time looking for answers and names for events and situations; boxes to put them in and labels to apply so that we understand and think we know how to act on them. Not only for ourselves but for the people around us, to help them understand also. When I doubt very much that our lives are able to be reduced to such simple terms. When you think of all the environmental factors our bodies come into contact with daily; food, water, chemicals in personal products, chemicals in cleaning products, exhaust fumes and simply bacteria and viruses – that are everywhere – it’s unbelievable that we don’t all spend every day in bed exhausted.
But we generally don’t and the systems work away for years until one day they stop functioning properly. And then you’re looking for answers. Like a crazed manager, trying to track down someone to blame for a mistake.